Maadhavi sat in the auto rickshaw adjusting her top. There was no point. Wearing layers in the Mumbai heat was a fool’s errand. But, there was no other way. If her father saw her stepping out of the house in the dress she was to wear to the party, she would no longer have a home. Only two years more. Once she completed her graduation, she could marry Sebastian and there would be no need to hide.

 

“Idhar side me rok dijiye” she said to the auto driver, offering up the fare in her right hand.

 

In fifteen minutes, she was standing on the balcony of the high rise apartment looking down at the sunset.

 

Her dress, a blue body-con with long sleeves and a plunging neck line was somehow not outrageous anymore. She held her coffee in her hand and fantasized a married life with Sebastian. She never thought of herself as the marriage type. But, this was her only ticket out. The only way she could free herself.

 

“Maddy beta come on in. We’re about to serve dinner” Mrs. Rodriguez said from the kitchen.

 

She turned back in and looked at all the people gathered. Kids, teens, adults, Sebastian’s family. They would soon be hers. She hoped and prayed they would.

 

They all sat together in the hall, said grace and ate. Then, there was wine, there was music, there was dancing, there was kissing, there were jollities all around. Sebastian’s new house was officially open.

 

The summer turned into winter and once again, Maadhavi found herself on the same balcony, in the same dress, staring at the same city. Except, this time, her lover, Sebastian was beside her, wine in hand, staring at the sky with her.

 

If only she could shout from the balcony and say that he was hers, to have forever. That she no longer belonged to Mr. Atul Savarkar. That she was no longer caged.

 

This one year was the most incidental year of her life. In one year, she had found the courage to break her shackles, unclip her wings and be the one she wanted. The price she had to pay was an unhappy family and a new surname. But, that was nothing compared to her freedom.

 

She began to reminisce about the night after the last time she stood there wearing that dress. The anger in her father’s eyes, the tears in her mother’s. The only one supportive of her dating a Christian was her little brother. But, it would be many years until his voice would mean something in the family.

 

She thought back to the day when, with her friends as witness, she took Sebastian as hers. For better or for worse, for richer or for poorer, in sickness and in health, till death do them part. That was positively the happiest day of her life. She was not Maadhavi Savarkar anymore. She was Maddie Rodriguez. And Maddie Rodriguez was not anyone’s prisoner.

 

“Merry Christmas Mads”

 

“Merry Christmas Sobo”

 

He put his arms around her and they both stared at the limitless sky.

 

 

“Awlelelelelele”

 

Maadhavi looked at her mother play with her two year old. The proud grandmother held her grandson’s hand as he trotted about the balcony. Maadhavi, meanwhile, sat in a bamboo chair, coffee in hand, staring at her mother play. This was the first time she had seen her in two years. It’s funny what grandchildren can do for grandmothers.

 

“Why didn’t baba come?” she asked.

 

Her mother looked up stunned for a second then traced her eyes back to her grandson.

 

“You know how he is. He’ll come around. You don’t worry”

 

“I’m not worried. Honestly I know he doesn’t care”
 

“Don’t say that. He cares a lot. He was ready to come to the hospital when you had your delivery”
 

“Then why didn’t he?”

 

“He’s a man of his word”

 

“Of course he is”

 

Maadhavi could still feel the pain she felt when her father had told her to never come back. When he’d said that he would never see her face again. She always found it funny. How even though she borderline hated him, she always yearned for his approval the most. But that never stopped her from being the rebel she was.

 

“Next time, come here only if he is with you” she said.

 

“That’s no way to speak to your mother love” she looked at the door to the balcony.

 

“Aunty, you and uncle are welcome to come here whenever you want” her husband said with a smile on his face.

 

That night, out of the blue, Maddie’s question caught him off guard.

 

“Do you know what he did to me?”

 

“He didn’t rape you, he didn’t beat you”

 

“No. He caged me. I was nothing compared to his tradition and his honour. They always came before his love for me.”

“He’s your father. He’s old fashioned and traditional but he is still your father.”

“He lost that right when he told me to get out of the house”

 

“He was angry”

“That is not a justification. That can be used to excuse anything. Any crime can be justified with ‘he was angry”

 

Suddenly, the cry of a baby rang through the bedroom.

 

“I’ll go look. You go to sleep” he said.

 

She gave him a weak smile.

 

But she couldn’t sleep. Her father, her mother, her family haunted her. She knew they loved her. Her father had just liked a picture of Kenneth a few hours earlier. But then why couldn’t he ever come and see him? Why couldn’t he ever come see her? They only lived twenty minutes away. But, forever passed yet, the twenty-minute ride never came.

 

She thought back to what Sebastian had said. It was true. Her father had never physically hurt her. Yet, she always felt a pain in her chest when she thought about him. Was it really any better than if he had physically beaten her?

 

She got out of bed and walked into the balcony. She breathed in the night air. She had lived caged for the better part of her life. This, this feeling of freedom, she wouldn’t give that away for anyone.